- Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. So if you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
- Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.
- Men are like spray paint. One squeeze and they're all over you.
- Men are like fish ... neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut.
- Just because men have one, doesn't mean they have to be one.
- Men are like lava lamps. Fun to look at, but not all that bright.
- Why men are like toilets: 1) They are always out of order. 2) They stink. 3) The nice ones are always engaged. 4) They consume large amounts of liquid. 5) They are constantly full of crap.
- Men are like cement ... after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.
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